Losing Friends

20 Sep

It’s not easy raising a gender variant boy, just as you are getting used to one hurdle, along comes another. today’s hurdle is not one that I’ve overcome yet, but I will.

I knew, when we started down this journey, that their would be criticisms, that some people wouldn’t like that I was allowing David to be who he wants to be when who he wants to be is a girly boy. The world has come a long way in the last few decades, it’s still not common place to see a little boy walking down the street in a tutu and Minnie Mouse coat. I’ve been lucky so far and have had no comments and neither has my little boy but my luck just ran out. today, a person I considered a friend has decided to have no more to do with me.

It’s pretty hard, there are a myriad of emotions running through my mind, sorrow at the loss of a friend, disbelief that anyone I know could be so narrow minded, anger that anyone would rather I let my little boy be unhappy than allow him to live in a way that doesn’t conform to society’s expectations, and gratitude.

Gratitude that she slipped out of the back door quietly, just leaving a little note on a group that she had blocked me as she couldn’t keep her mouth shut any longer. I really am grateful that that was the path she chose rather than in her own words “start a full blown “bully attack””. I’m sure that one day, someone will attack me over my choice to let my child flourish in his own way but I’m very glad that day wasn’t today and I’m very glad it wasn’t by someone I respect and care about.

I get that what David does is unusual, and not every mum would be willing to let her little boy dress as a girl pretty much full time, but I’m not every mum. I’m this mum and I’m making decisions daily that are difficult and 9 times out of ten I come down on the side of my child. I’ll continue to do this and to be honest, I wish that all those that couldn’t accept it would just walk away now rather than having to lose them in dribs and drabs.

at some point I’ll look back on this and shrug, know it was all part of our journey and that I’m stronger for having gone through it. In the meantime, I’m gonna take some time to be sad.


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